Challenge fic: Scarecrow on a Stick

[amedia]

Title: Scarecrow on a Stick
Author: Amedia
Characters: Cain/Ambrose
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Imagiquest Entertainment. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Note: Response to a challenge from theemdash, who is promulgating "Something on a Stick Day" by encouraging people to commit porn fic that contains, well, something on a stick. Originally posted here.


Boingy. Boingy. Crash. Clatter. Boingy. Boingy.

Cain wasn't sure what that sound was, but as the head of security for the Northern Palace, he felt obligated to investigate. Following the sound, he found himself approaching an overgrown playground where someone appeared to be practicing on a pogo stick. As he came closer, he recognized the Queen's Chief Advisor, in full regalia and looking quite elegant except for the bandage around his head and the aforementioned pogo stick.

"Gli—Ambrose, what do you think you're doing?" Cain asked, standing as close as he dared.

Crash. Clatter. Ambrose picked himself up, waving off Cain's proffered assistance, brushed himself off, and said with some dignity, "Doctor Iatros recommended this as one of a number of balance exercises to reintegrate the gross-motor coordination areas of my brain."

"Oh," Cain said. "Um, don't you need a spotter?" He picked up the stick, noting how dented and battered it was from frequent tumbles. "This looks dangerous."

"Nonsense," said Ambrose. "I'm a grown man. I've traveled the entire O.Z. with half a brain; I think I can manage a child's toy with a full one." He held out his hand and Cain handed him the stick. "You haven't asked me what other exercises she recommended."

Cain sighed. "Oh, all right. What other exercises did she recommend? I don't see a hula-hoop anywhere. Line dancing?"

Ambrose stepped closer. "Sex."

"Sex?" Cain asked.

"Lots and lots of it."

"That sounds dangerous, too.'

Ambrose smiled. "Only if you want it to be."

"Only if I—hey, are you propositioning me?"

Ambrose made a show of looking around the deserted area. "Unless you see another possible referent for 'you' around here. I'm not talking to the pogo stick."

"Better not be," Cain murmured, just before he leaned forward and kissed Ambrose.

The pogo stick fell to the ground. Clatter. Neither of them noticed it.

Comments

[spikedluv]

Hee! I'm not talking to the pogo stick."

"Better not be,"

Very cute. *g*

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Apologies for the latenss - thank you! Glad you enjoyed!

[truthwritaslies.livejournal.com]

you have made my horrible week long cold a little bit better. after all they say laughter is the best medicine. ♥

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Sorry I'm late - hope your cold is better now! Glad the fic helped. :-)

[avari-maethor.livejournal.com]

-giggle- Tre cute. Now someone needs to draw Ambrose on a pogo stick.

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Belatedly replying -

Now someone needs to draw Ambrose on a pogo stick.

Hee hee! That would be fun! Thanks for the sweet comments!

[koslorollo.livejournal.com]

Ha! You rule. Your Tiara of Ruling is in the post.

"Lots and lots of it."
hehehe... aggressive!Ambrose ftw!

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Ha! You rule. Your Tiara of Ruling is in the post.

I took so long to answer this, I got the Tiara already! Shiny! Thank you!

"Lots and lots of it."
hehehe... aggressive!Ambrose ftw!

I was sort-of channeling a scene from Red Dwarf, the one where Rimmer is on the ship full of holograms and one of the women explains how they spend their time. "Sex. Lots and lots of sex" or words to that effect, in this incredibly sultry voice.

And I do like agressive!Ambrose, too! Always nice to shake up expectations.

[blackletter]

"Doctor Iatros"

*giggles at pun*

"Unless you see another possible referent for 'you' around here. I'm not talking to the pogo stick."

I feel there are (in)appropriate jokes about sex on a pogo stick that should be made here. Sadly, I'm not clever enough to think of them. But the whole fic made me grin all the same.

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Apologies for the late reply -

"Doctor Iatros"
*giggles at pun*

Thanks! It was actually a failure of imagination - I needed a name fast and that's what popped into my head first.

Sex on a pogo stick! Eeeee!

[nuavarion.livejournal.com]

*Snicker* I love the sound effects.

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Sorry for the late reply -

*Snicker* I love the sound effects.

I had fun writing them! I'm so glad you liked them!

[magicscalpel.livejournal.com]

The pogo stick fell to the ground. Clatter. Neither of them noticed it.
The pogo stick did. ;_;

Gee, thanks. Now I'll never be able to look at my pogo stick the same way again, because my brain involuntarily processed the outcome of this conversation as them actually USING the pogo stick. Cain/Glitch/Pogo Stick. DO IT GUYS.

Hilarious and imaginative~!

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Belatedly replying -

Cain/Glitch/Pogo Stick. DO IT GUYS.

Eeeee!!!! My brain! My brain! It just exploded!

;-)

rofl!

[lionille.livejournal.com]

I, too, loved your use of sound effects. My favorite line, however, was this:
he recognized the Queen's Chief Advisor, in full regalia and looking quite elegant except for the bandage around his head
Followed very closely by this:
"Nonsense," said Ambrose. "I'm a grown man. I've traveled the entire O.Z. with half a brain; I think I can manage a child's toy with a full one."
Hilarious visuals. "Full regalia." *chortles*
♥

[lionille.livejournal.com]

P.S. Your icon both horrifies and delights me...

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Thank you for all of your kind comments on both the story and the icon - sorry for the belated reply!

Your favorite line is my favorite line. ("I'm a grown man...") Squee!

And yeah, the icon was pure evil. *snicker*

[candacestls.livejournal.com]

'wonders how she can work a pogo stick into current story'

Hey, gotta love a man bouncing on a stick, I always say.....believe me, I always do say that :)

You made me smile, sweets, good work

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Hey, gotta love a man bouncing on a stick, I always say.....believe me, I always do say that :)


I believe you, I do, I do!

Running late on answering these, but thank you thank you for your comments - they always make me smile grin like an idiot!

[oddsbobs.livejournal.com]

this made me smile! :D

[amedia.livejournal.com]

this made me smile! :D

Thank you! That makes me happy! (sorry I'm running so late answering feedback!)